Being a transman, sex has always been a tricky subject. With dysphoria playing a bigger role in our lives, the sex life of transmen often becomes complicated. I refrain from getting into any such situations because of the fear of feeling dysphoric or creating an awkward situation.

The result of this is that many a time I have felt inexperienced on issues based on sex. Personally, as far as I remember, I started having sexual urges at the age of 14. While growing up, I could not find any documents or materials to learn about sex and pleasure for transmen.

I had searched the internet, watched porn videos and also found a few books on sex during the entire process. However, all of them focus on either straight or homosexual cisgender people. With time and experience, I have learnt what does sex and sexual pleasures mean to me as a transman.

For me, a healthy sexual relationship would be the comfort level that I share with my partner, the understanding level of my partner and it would involve active negotiation. For me, sex is about pleasure, even though at times I also get influenced by performativity.

Most of the time the hypothetical standards created for men and attached to masculinity affects our sex life as well. In order to understand issues based on the sex life of transmen, I spoke to two transmen from Delhi. Read more via Feminism in India